How Observing Your Child Supports Sensory Processing: OT perspective

During occupational therapy evaluations, I often ask parents questions about how their child moves, plays, or responds to everyday situations. A common response I hear is, “I don’t know, I’ve never noticed.”

That answer is more common than you might think, and it makes complete sense. Parenting is busy, and most of us are focused on getting through the day rather than closely observing the how behind our child’s actions. Parenting a sensory child can feel overwhelming

When this happens, I invite parents to intentionally observe their child over time. Then, during our results meeting, many parents circle back to that original question and share how it opened their eyes to something new—how their child approaches a task, how they move their body, or how they respond when things don’t go as planned. These insights are incredibly valuable. They help occupational therapists guide parents in learning how to best support their child in meaningful, individualized ways.

Parenting is a marathon, not a race—especially when you are parenting a sensory child. The reality is that no single sensory strategy works forever or in every situation. Children grow, environments change, and needs evolve. One of the most powerful tools you have as a parent is simply taking focused time to observe your child.

The information you gain through observation can help you work collaboratively with the OT to develop strategies and supports that are tailored to your child’s unique strengths and challenges. When you’re observing, try to pause the urge to jump in immediately. As long as no one is being hurt, physically or emotionally, allow the situation to play out. Notice what your child does. Do they try alternative strategies? Do they become frustrated quickly? Do they recover on their own, or do they need support to regulate?

Ideally, observe your child for at least one week. If you’re able, two to three weeks is even better, as it allows patterns to emerge over time.

The best way to keep track of what you notice is to journal. This doesn’t need to be fancy. You can write in a notebook, jot notes on the back of an envelope, type in your phone, or record a quick voice memo. The timing is up to you and what fits into your life.

• Some parents journal briefly at specific times of day: for example at breakfast, lunch and dinner

• others journal at the end of the day

• You might write after a memorable moment that highlights your child’s strengths or challenges.

• And if you have a great memory, you might prefer to reflect and journal at the end of the week.

There is no “right” way to observe or journal, only the way that works for you and that you are consistent. What matters most is giving yourself the space to notice. Those small moments of awareness can lead to meaningful understanding and more effective support for your child.

When you are observing your child, focus less on what they are doing and more on how they are doing it. Notice how your child transitions between activities and how their body moves during play and daily routines. Pay attention to their responses to sensory input such as noise, movement, touch, or visual stimulation. Observe how they react when something is challenging or unexpected... do they become dysregulated quickly, seek help, avoid the task, or try a different strategy? Notice how long it takes them to recover and return to a calm, regulated state. Also look for patterns in energy level, attention, emotional responses, and self-soothing behaviors across the day. These observations provide important clues about your child’s sensory processing and regulation and help guide supportive strategies that truly match their individual needs.

Taking the time to observe your child is not about finding problems or doing things “right.” It is about building understanding. When you share your observations with your child’s occupational therapist or anyone on your child’s support team, such as teachers, caregivers, or other providers, you give them valuable, real-life information that can’t always be captured in a single session or evaluation. These shared insights help the team create strategies that are more meaningful, consistent, and effective across environments. Most importantly, your observations help ensure that your child is supported as a whole person, honoring their strengths while gently addressing their challenges. You know your child best, and your perspective is a powerful part of the team.